Tips for your 21st birthday (or the legal drinking age in your country), so you can have the best night you’ll hardly remember.
-If you’re wearing a dress, wear proper underwear. Yes thongs are cute, but pictures of your exposed lady parts on the internet while you are shitfaced, not so cute. Don’t pull a Britney, a Paris, or a Lindsay. . .please wear underpants!
-Don’t wear anything strapless. It just sounds like a “girls gone wild” accident waiting to happen.
- Whether you wear high heels, wedges, ballet flats, sandals, or whatever, those shoes better have an ankle strap. This way you’ll be less likely to lose them. Trust me on this one.
-Tonight is not the night to go the most expensive restaurant and order the most expensive dish. With the large amount of alcohol you are about to consume, there is a significantly increased chance that you are going to throw up. As nice as a fancy dinner on your birthday sounds, throwing up lobster and filet mignon isn’t very nice. Go to TGI Friday’s like a normal person.
-Bring your boyfriend/husband/guy friend with you. I can almost guarantee you a creepy drunk man will somehow find out it’s your birthday, crawl out of the woodworks, and insist on “birthday spankings”. Obviously you do not want to go through a traumatizing experience like that, so having a guy with your group of friends will help out tremendously.
-You will probably drunk dial and/or text someone. Either turn off your phone, delete a few numbers of people you are prone to calling (like an ex), or be prepared to possible be confronted the next day.
-Bring a friend who is going to be not nearly as drunk as you are. A good friend will help keep those creepy bar guys away from you. A good friend will hold back your hair for you if you get sick. A good friend will make sure you do not wake up next to a stranger the next morning. Basically a good friend will look after you.
-Start drinking early. Have a mimosa at breakfast, a beer at lunch, and a glass of wine at dinner. If you are a newbie at this whole drinking thing, at the bar/club, start off slow. Try sticking with beer and mixed drinks. If you’re like me, dive straight in!
-If you have a great bartender, TIP THEM WELL!!! Especially if you plan on making the place you’re at your regular watering hole. Seriously, tip your bartender! They will remember you and they will treat you accordingly.
-Speaking of bartenders, if the bar is busy, already know what drink you are going to order. Don’t annoy them.
-Never ever say, “the next rounds’ on me!” That is a sure fire way to quickly deplete your drinking fund.
-Before bed, drink as much water as you can physically drink. This will help with your hangover the next morning. Also keep a bottle of tums and painkillers nearby.
-Don’t try to recreate any of The Hangover movies; shenanigans like that take time and practice.
The Garden Wall
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