I said I would buy pounds upon pounds of makeup glitter as it is the perfect form of nonviolent revenge. Let me explain.
While working at home, I’ve found myself watching way too much television and YouTube. And something I find particualry funny are the Allstate commercials. Something about that man in a suit pretending to be a raccoon or a GPS really makes me laugh.
So does Allstate cover random attacks of glitter? Say a woman breaks into her ex’s apartment for whatever reason and instead of spray painting some profanity everywhere, she gets smart and decides to cover everything in glitter.
As we all know, glitter is...
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Insomnia Musings
I’m thinking about casting an evil voodoo witch doctor spell on the next person who says, “Just lie down and close your eyes.” Because it’s just that easy! Now I’m considering carrying around a creepy shrunken head to repel those older men that I seem to attract. And possibly repel the strange people I seem to encounter on public transportation.
Now I’m thinking about how much money my neighbor spends on cigarettes. One time she was smoking so much, MY smoke alarm went off. Lets see. . . a pack a day, assuming each pack costs $6, is. . . $180. Holy Shit!!! That is 9 pairs of $20 shoes, 12 pairs if Payless is having a bogo...
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