Am I Ugly?

I’m taking a break from my drunken debauchery to talk about something disturbing. Apparently this "Am I Ugly?" thing is a huge craze on YouTube, and it just makes me really sad.

Have you ever read any YouTube comments? Even a video showing cute puppies has comments from the most negative people. It’s just sad that these young girls want to subject themselves to this. If YouTube was around when I was a preteen, I probably would’ve done the same thing. Thankfully I’ve gained a lot of self-confidence since then.

I’ve had people tell me I’m beautiful, I’ve had people tell me that I “need to get some work done” but at the end of the day I love myself and that is all that matters.

Also know that physical beauty is very subjective. A few years ago, Jessica Simpson had a TV. show called, “The Price of Beauty.” The point of the show was “"to meet women, study local fashions, dietary fads and beauty regimes," all in an attempt to explore the meaning of true beauty in different cultures” according to Wikipedia. I found this show very eye opening and it showed me that beauty in Japan is way different than beauty in Uganda, or Brazil. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What one person may call ugly, another will consider beautiful.

This subject also brings up the question, what is “ugly” supposed to mean anyways? To me “ugly” applies to anyone who is mean spirited and full of hate. I don’t care if you’re a Supermodel, if you have a rotten personality, I consider you “ugly”.

To all the preteens, teenagers, and even us adults, know that you are beautiful tell yourself that every day.

Instead ask yourself:

Am I smart? Funny? Witty? Confident?
Am I a good friend? Sister? Mother? Daughter?
Do I do the right thing even if no one else is watching?
Do I want to change the world and make it a better place?

So please ladies, stop with this “Am I ugly?” and “Please rate me on a scale of 1-10” bullshit. Instead listen to “Beautiful” by Christina Aguilera, remind yourself on how awesome you are, and remember that your haters’ opinions DO NOT matter.

Read More

Dear Random Bar Guys,

You’re an interesting bunch of people to say the least. I know it’s not fair to judge you because of a few bad apples, but for the sake of my letter and sanity, I will.

But really, you are an interesting bunch of people. I already had to write a PSA regarding your strange behavior, and now…well you’ve really hit an all-time low.

I’m not sure who taught you how to talk to women, but whoever did should be shot with a high caliber machine gun until they resemble Swiss cheese. Whatever happened to: “Hi. What’s your name? I’m...Nice to meet you!” Then followed by regular small talk. ?????????????? Only a fraction of you did this! What the fuck?!?!

Here are my favorite lines of the night from the lagoon creatures I encountered:

“Hey, yo, light skinned girl…” Does my skin color really matter?

“If I was your boyfriend I’d never let you out the house looking as hot as you do.” Wow! That is insanely creepy.

“Hey Jenna or whatever your name is, can I get your number?” No, and my name is not Jenna, it’s Gina or Gigi. Not that you really care.

“You dance really good for an anorexic looking girl.” Thanks for that back handed compliment asshole. And it’s called a fast metabolism.

“Fine then, I don’t need your number anyways! Why don’t you and your mosquito bites go to the bar and get drunk!” Uh why do you think I’m at the bar in the first place? And “mosquito bites”?, I wrote a whole public service announcement about this.

“What you don’t date gangstas/brothas/(racial slur)?” I don’t creepy guys. And although I’m light skinned, I’m actually mixed, so don’t play the race card with me.

“You’re pretty hot…for an emo girl.” Another lame attempt at a backhanded compliment… I’m confused as well since I don’t even look emo.

“If I got you drunk enough, I bet you’d go home with me.” This was my favorite line from the night. I could write an entire post about this sentence alone it was so awful. There is no amount of alcohol in the world that would have gotten me to go home with you.

I’m almost at a loss of words because of this strange behavior. The fact that multiple guys said this bullshit makes me lose faith in the male species. I believe that everyone has a soul mate, but did mine get hit by a bus or something?!

Your behavior needs to change guys.

Sincerely,
One Pissed Off Woman

Read More

Itty Bitty Titty Committe PSA

A random guy, at a random bar, told me (after I rejected him) that I should join said committee. From having an auntie that is a retired psychotherapist, I know that this guy was just upset about not getting my phone number, and therefore felt the need to insult me for the sake of his ego. But really?! What a lame, so called “insult”. If you’re going to insult someone, 1. have a really good reason to, and 2. try to be clever about it.

I am a proud member of this committee, Dammit! I always have been, and according to my strange family genetics, I will be for the next 20 years or so.

What really irks me is that this lagoon creature, posing as a man, thinks my self-esteem and my wonderful a cups are somehow related.

Well young man, you are mistaken. Without trying to get all “woman’s studies,” I’m going to spit some hot fire of truth at you. (And thank you to the lovely Jenna Marbles for coming up with “hot fire of truth!”)
You should consider yourself lucky that I even acknowledged your presence. Just because I was at a bar drinking, does not mean I was on the search for a one night stand. Just because I am getting divorced does not mean I have some heavy emotional baggage. I am not desperate for a man. . .especially one of your lowly caliber.

I’m beginning to grow a backbone dammit! And I hope the lovely ladies who read my blog have a backbone too. If you’ve got small tits, humongous bosoms, if you’re pencil thin, or you’ve got a big butt and cannot lie, EMBRACE what you have! There’s already too much pressure from society on how we’re supposed to look. So don’t let a man bring you down. Ever.

Read More